“…..let that great sweeping wind blow the fog out of her soul…” L.M. Montgomery (Anne of Green Gables)
It’s biting cold. Our first proper frosty morning, with a nice dollop of fog to boot. Layering up, I tip toe out into the meadow.
I get very little time in my week to enjoy these early mornings. It’s gotten to the point where I am virtually working seven days on the trot. Maybe most people are?
I’ve been trying to keep up with three jobs plus a household of creative types. I love all my jobs it’s not that. It’s just that I’m tired.
So my big decision is to take a year off the day job and to go it alone for a while. Sometimes I’m scared I might be falling backwards into a bed of nettles but mostly it feels like falling forwards into a warm sea and swimming towards an unknown shore. I hope there are some sun umbrellas and a cocktail bar there!
Everyone asks what I will be doing with my year off? Being OFF is what I say. Off. Proper off.
This is where you will find me. Wandering aimlessly on a frosty morning; mooching at dead leaves, waiting for the sun to burn through the fog, talking to a new generation of Robins.
Already I know that my industrious side will resist. Won’t take this new plan lying down. There’s a danger in making space. Stuff creeps in. My eyes wander to the ceilings that need painting, the files that should be shredded, the yard that needs clearing. I want to visit old friends, elder relatives, archive family photos. I have dreams about more connection, art, time for creativity. My notebooks are full of scrawly mind maps. Lists that go on and on.
So I take a deep breath and go back to “proper off” as the best possible use of my time. Start with that and the rest will take care of itself.
Oh my goodness – these photos are so beautiful.
Great for taking soft photos!!
“I have dreams about more connection…” Perfect. I spent two days walking through old cemeteries, searching for ancestors, then, searching old newspaper archives. I am building a fascinating portrait of their lives–not just names and days died and children, but what is might have been like.
That sounds like a wonderful project. Seems we have more interest in the past as we get older too? Another nice surprise. Nothing I like more than hanging out in graveyards! Haha! Seriously though, I do!!!
Catherine.. relax .we r at that of time of Life enjoy.
Still love your post. HAPPY Christmas.
I will!! Happy Christmas Jimmy:~)
Not working is an art form that I have perfected :). It takes time, patience and industrious endeavour of the drifting kind. I do hope you enjoy your downtime – life is precious and needs to be observed at a slow pace. I am living proof that is works. Enjoy.
Funny isn’t it how things can get out of hand? I love your phrase….the drifting kind……I can feel the benefit of that image already….xx
Enjoy every second! remember fog always disappears as quick as it appears and those nettles, just pretend their buttercups!! well deserved and I’;ll be thinking of you and checking in regularly xxx
Thanks Molly! It would be lovely to hang out with our cameras some day, outside of everything else. That is if YOU ever get the time xx
Dear Catherine. I drink in the beauty of your photos, and the richness of your writing. They are a gift.
But I understand totally that bone weariness you speak of, the need to rest, to fill up the soul and body’s need now for quiet, for,space, for,solitude etc. especially after your enormous output.
And yes, that next space can be scary…I know as I come to the end of my own time on our golden coast , as I realise a real need to return to my home in the southern state of Victoria with all its cold and wintry weather, its grey skies and heavy morning mists.. but it’s home, and with the challenging weather comes th bonus of Melbourne’s urban and cultural bounty, and my own rich history there.
Swings and roundabouts , that seems to be my life as I face the next stage, the end of life years…
Dangerous? Yes, always, but I need the freedom to lift off from here, to move back to where the heart calls me, and will not stop tugging at me…- HOME!
So…follow your intuitions etc…Take care, and do what you need to do to be well and content, whatever it takes…Give yourself the precious gift of time…
We live and love through different stages, and so have different perceptions and needs…times for productivity, time for recharging our tired souls.
Sending love from Oz,
BARBARA
XXX
Thanks Barbara! It feels sometimes that there are some of us on twin tracks….I love that you have been able to hold both at once, home and away. We are both following intuition and facing the next stage. I suppose everyone is in their own way. I love having you along side of me through it all, a synergy between two hemispheres xx
Catherine – love the photos xxxx will ring you tomorrow – need to process this news ! Sounds like a great idea – suzanne
I am now weighing up between the 3 Suzanna’s I know!!! Any or all of you, I look forward to that chat xxx
The question of what will you do on your year off is like the question I get whenever I take a vacation from work. Since I rarely travel or do anything “special” on my vacation, the point is as you say, “being off” and imagining how glorious it will be when I don’t have to return to “being on.” Enjoy!
Exactly Maery Rose! That wonderful moment when you wake up in the morning and realise you have absolutely NOWHERE to go!!! Bring it on xx
“Stuff totally creeps in!” Voice of experience here! Excited for you and to follow along on your journey!
As long as the stuff that creeps in is the right stuff eh?? x
Properly off:) Such a delicious sound.
Wildly inspired at reading this! Thank you.
For being true to your heart and risking rest.
It’s such a brave, brave thing.
Bravo, you!
-Jennifer
I have been preparing for it for a while. There comes the right time for everything. Everyone I say it to, they go, O I want to do that too!!! It seems I am not alone in longing for a good rest….Thank you so much for cheering me on xx
Good luck on your year off. Beautiful images to begin it with! 🙂
Thank you!! Here’s to more in 2017:~)